Wednesday, October 28, 2020
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Manfred (“Manny”, “Junior”, “Daddy” and “Papa”) P. Bufano
Eulogy
March 11, 2016
Claire, Michael, Lisa, Capri, Briar and I want to thank you all and the many, many others who came to honor our family patriarch and friend to all.
It could go without saying, but since I heard it over and over time and time again, not only this week but for the better part of my life, I just want to let you all know we were all listening and truly took comfort in knowing how great a man my father-in-law is to all of us here.
Although Manny lost sight in his left eye recently, he always had a blind eye when it came to helping others.
My father-in-law is the best father-in-law any man could only hope to have, he was always going out of his way to help others,
be it a person he never meant before,
a friend,
an animal,
a person less than half his age,
older, or
anywhere in between which includes all of us here.
He was always there to lend a hand.
He could fix anything and make it better than it was originally built or intended to be used,
just come to our house and I can show you a number of examples of that.
I for one know,
I will miss him more each tomorrow than every yesterday.
Because I will never know the half of what he did for me and my family.
That was another thing about my father-in-law and a best friend forever or BFF as the kids say.
He was a modest man and would never tell you about what he did for others,
which is why we are so grateful that so many of you shared those memories you had with him.
I always tell my friends and colleagues that I try to live my life and make decisions that my daughter’s would be proud of – that’s the best moral compass.
I know Manny had a lot to do with my finding that compass in life.
The best tribute to a man at this stage of one’s life is for his family to hear all those great things that he did for others from such people themselves.
So I thank you all again for sharing such memories with us and please continue to do so as you think of or hear about other memories we, the family, would be proud to know about.
I am one of the most thankful people in this room, not only to Manny, but at least equally to Claire because the two of them together shared one of their greatest gifts to each other with me, my wife Lisa.
Although we all wish we had him here with us today, Lisa and I thank god we got to return our greatest gifts to each other with Claire and Manny, the Best Nana and Greatest Papa a loving parent and grandchild could ever have.
Well, we can all dream, but we all have something even better than dreams.
We have oh so many memories that will help continue to put smiles on each and every one of our faces when we take some time to reflect on what this great man and in a word “patriarch” did for and with us.
Papa always went above and beyond to celebrate all the holidays and special occasions like birthdays, pool parties and especially Easter, Halloween and Christmas.
I still remember my first Christmas with Lisa and her family when we were dating.
I never saw a Christmas tree as big as they had, not to mention the huge train set and all the moving manikins, long before people really had those type of decoration in their homes.
The impression that is still burned in my memory is “Wow this guy needs some grandkids to share all of this love with.”
Well we gave him that and he continued to make the holidays even more special ever since.
I am pretty confident we have the biggest tree in Haworth,
Lisa, like her Daddy, wouldn’t know or want our daughters to know Christmas any other way, and we could always count on my BFF to drop off some amazing decoration pieces each year. Be it the Christmas Bear that greats everyone at our door that is almost as big as Junior,
right next to the Santa that is bigger than me,
and the beautiful elves perched high above our door,
the list goes on and on
as any of you that have been to our house for the holidays all know.
It definitely feels like you are in a winter wonderland at Santa’s workshop in the North Pole in our house during the holiday season.
If Hollywood ever thought about making a sequel to Peter Pan,
I could see the setting being in the North Pole
and Manny could have walked right out of central casting to win the leading role because he would not be acting.
I know it will be hard for us to regain those feelings in the coming holidays, but I also know my BFF is and always will be with us each and every day for the rest of our lives.
And more than ever, we owe it to him and his spirit to enjoy those holidays - remembering and talking about how much he really loved the holidays.
I can promise you all that if you do and you close your eyes at times during those holidays, you will be able to see him smiling,
and if you don’t rest assured when I close my eyes I will see him crying.
So I ask that we make him smile more than ever each and every day,
if you want him to continue to be the proudest man, husband, daddy and Papa we know.
We struggled at time this week as to what name we should use, Manfred, Manny, Junior,
in reality the list is even longer when it comes to most of us in this room.
Some other titles that I am sure come to mine to you in this room, would include
“Great Man”,
“friend” who would turn to you in your time of need (I will never know the number of times he took care of things in our house that I didn’t even know needed fixing),
an unpaid chauffeur,
a Hudson county buster,
a perfectionist,
a true Jack, I mean Manny-of-all-trades, not just electric,
and the right hand in many of our life’s.
However some of us in this room were fortunate to have exclusive titles for him.
At first I thought Life Loving Partner, Greatest Daddy, and Best Papa.
But just as we struggled to pick one name for the obituary notice,
the prayer cards, that I hope you all have and read,
and the marble of his final resting place,
I thought it wasn’t quite right to limit those adjectives to any individual one,
because all of us know Manny had no limits when it came to those adjectives or anything else good in life for that matter.
He will continue to always be the Greatest, Best and Life Loving Partner, Daddy, Papa and Father-In-Law to Claire, Michael, Lisa, Capri, Briar and me.
One of the many things that Manny taught the six of us was there is no limits on love.
God Bless You – we know your spirit will always be with and comfort us. I love you and know we will be with you again someday.
